Lindsay Lohan got fat.

99801254 Lindsay Lohan Started Using My Diet

So, Lindsay called me the other day and asked what I ate on a daily basis, after the two-hour conversation she hung up. I see her a week later and had blown up! I don’t know if she went swimming in a carb-infested pool of Twinkies or overdosed on some BBQ ribs, but she is looking CHUNKY.

There are two types of actresses: the kind that made it because they are hot, and the kind that made it because they are good at acting. It’s not hard to tell which one landed Lindsay the job. However, now that she’s losing her hot-ness, there is absolutely no reason to put her in a movie! I wouldn’t even put her on the radio with as bad as she’s starting to get.

Lindsay, if you are reading this, you can always come cuddle with me and my teddy-bear made out of chocolate.

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