By Julia

The holidays are upon us, and with the season of giving it’s also the season of Perfect Ornament Placement Disorder. The primary symptoms of P.O.P.D. are heightened in the Winter; primarily through the months of November and December. It’s a type of mood disorder that triggers symptoms of anger, rage, and extreme obsessive compulsion. It has been suggested to not disturb a person with P.O.P.D. when they are in arms length of a Christmas tree, and to keep them away from the smell of pine to not offset any extreme symptoms.


Symptoms of Perfect Ornament Placement Disorder include:

  1. Extreme amounts of excitement around a bare tree. Will let everyone believe that decorating will be a “bonding” or “family” experience, but the tides will quickly change.
  2. Noticeable perspiration when another person is in the motions of placing an ornament, or decoration onto the tree, for fear that it’ll be “wrongly” placed.
  3. Belief that “ornament sizes matter”. And must be placed according to size. I.e., small on top, larger on bottom. Two similar colored ornaments can not and -will not- be placed next to each other. Members of the family, may be removed from the family if they do not follow proper instruction.
  4. Home made decorations, such as ornaments, even from children will be appreciated but immediately rejected from their tree.
  5. The words “my tree” could occur during times of decoration.
  6. Will walk outside, even drive by the front window outside to assess how the tree looks to passerbys. In most extreme cases, will ask strangers to “rate” their tree.
  7. Fits of extreme rage if there appears to be a “hole”. (A noticeable patch with NO ornament or proper decoration.)
  8. In lighter cases, will let young children “help”, to later remove their trash decorating skills and hope that they do not notice.
  9. Will often view other trees as “competition” and constantly make adjustments throughout the season to “win”
  10. Presents under the tree are also considered decoration. Arrangement matters.


There is no known “cure” for P.O.P.D. at this time. It is recommended to keep loved ones from triggers such as: pine scent(s), shiny objects, bay windows, and horribly decorated trees.


Do you know someone who suffers from Perfect Ornament Placement Disorder?




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